The death of Michael Jackson recently placed me in a tailspin for more than 48 hours. Death comes, sometimes unexpected but it comes. Michael Jackson's death came like a force out of nowhere and blasted a crater in the center of the world leaving us on the banks to mourn and ponder.

I never imagine that I'd be crying for hours, tearing for days over this. Face it, Jackson have done what few have managed to achieve somewhat... unite the world. I felt like I knew him personally, yet I never met the man. I felt like he was a friend. I was not even sure I was sad or happy since John Public found all kind unconceivable unpleasantries to break him. And its not like he did not already have enough of his own load bearing.

One of my twin is so into Jackson, it took three trips into Manhattan to various tributes for her to reconcile his death. I was watching a movie with my youngest girl around 2-ish when I heard the thumping of Amber's feet running down the stairs. Thats a constant occurrence here. It doesn't take much to cause excitement and the staircase is really short. My concern was that did not fall and sustain serious injury. I really did not pay too much attention to her until she flopped down beside me muttering something about Michael Jackson. Then I noticed that she was trembling.

Three years ago I started giving them an annual daily planners and requested that they write out what they want and how they plan to get what they want. She has taken it more seriously than her two sisters. One of her wish was to meet Michael Jackson (MJ) so she wrote it on her wish list in her planner. Its a wish that will not be fulfilled. The realization of that truth had my daughter on an emotional broiler. It forced me to release her to seek and find her own path to peace.

She had the cell phone in her left hand and her hand up to her cheek. She asked for me to stop the movie so she could see the news. Her sister was annoyed so when there was no breaking news I allowed her go back to the movie while Amber tweet for the latest info. I pulled her close to me and tried to comfort her with what I felt was the truth. "He'll be fine" I said. "He is not dying or dead because he was rushed to the hospital". "Mommy" she said "people are tweeting that TMZ reported he was not breathing" I decided to stop the movie, switch back to TV, scan the channels and wait for news. Half hour later it came that Michael Jacskosn died from cardiac arrest.......but, but, bu..t MJ was invincible how could he die?

I've thought about it, talked about it but I never imagined the reality of such a thing. What a calamity. A colossal lost to the world. He was a genius, a humanitarian, a different kind of man, a black man. So on that Thursday afternoon my girls and I sat on the large sofa which we sit on often with bathed breathe, switching from one channel to the next feeding on the news. Tears streaming down our faces. The other had twin busted in the door 3 hours later. She was crying. We hudled and cried and cried.

It was going on 7 O'clock when Amber broke the circle, walked over to the amplifier, hooked her ipod up turned up the volume ".... I'm bad, I'm bad" and started to dance. We all got up and began to dance, and scream, and dance, tears still flowing. Tears turned to laughter and then chatter about our fav. From one song to the other we celebrated with loud cheers the life of an artist we adored, we admired, whose talents we had great respect for.

I light a candle and placed it at the corner of the door. Two days amber went to Harlem to write on the wall that was created and place a letter in the srine. The biggest MJ fan is my ouse had found her door to peace of her idol's death. "I danced and cried with stranges mom. I've never ever in my life thought I'd see people of all color, race, size and social status come together without any issues.... it was great." Rhythms, roots and culture... R.I.P to Michael Jackson. Rock on.